As You Revise Your Draft Try to Correct All Problems in One Review

Chapter 12. Peer Review and Last Revisions

12.1 Revision

Learning Objectives

• Identify major areas of concern in the draft essay during revising
• Use peer reviews and checklists to aid revising
• Revise your paper to better organization and cohesion
• Make up one's mind an appropriate style and tone for your paper
• Revise to ensure that your tone is consistent
• Revise the starting time draft of your essay and produce a last draft

Revising and editing are the two tasks you undertake to significantly improve your essay. Both are very important elements of the writing process. Y'all may call up that a completed first draft means that petty comeback is needed. However, even experienced writers need to improve their drafts and rely on peers during revising and editing. You may know that athletes miss catches, fumble balls, or overshoot goals. Dancers forget steps, plow too slowly, or miss beats. For both athletes and dancers, the more than they practise, the stronger their performance volition get. Web designers seek better images, a more than clever design, or a more than appealing background for their web pages. Writing has the same capacity to profit from improvement and revision.

You should revise and edit in stages: do not expect to catch everything in one go. If each time you review your essay you focus on a different aspect of structure, yous volition be more likely to take hold of any mistakes or identify any issues. Throughout this chapter, you will see a number of checklists containing specific things to look for with each revision. For case, you will first look at how the overall paper and your ideas are organized.

In the second section of this chapter, you volition focus more than on editing: correcting the mechanical bug. Also at the terminate of the chapter, you will come across a comprehensive but more full general list of things you should be looking for.

Understanding the Purpose of Revising and Editing

Revising and editing permit you to examine two important aspects of your writing separately, so that you can give each task your undivided attending.

When you revise , you lot accept a second look at your ideas. You might add, cut, move, or alter information in club to make your ideas clearer, more accurate, more than interesting, or more than convincing.

When yous edit , y'all have a 2nd look at how you expressed your ideas. You add or change words. You prepare any problems in grammar, punctuation, and sentence structure. You ameliorate your writing manner. Yous make your essay into a polished, mature slice of writing, the finish production of your best efforts.

Tip

How practise you become the all-time out of your revisions and editing? Here are some strategies that writers take developed to expect at their outset drafts from a fresh perspective. Try them throughout the writing process; then keep using the ones that bring results.

Take a break. You are proud of what y'all wrote, but yous might be too close to it to make changes. Set up aside your writing for a few hours or fifty-fifty a twenty-four hour period until you can expect at information technology considerately.

Enquire someone you trust for feedback and constructive criticism.

Pretend you are one of your readers. Are you lot satisfied or dissatisfied? Why?

For many people, the wordscritic,critical, andcriticism provoke only negative feelings that make them blush, grumble, or shout. However, as a writer and a thinker, y'all need to learn to be disquisitional of yourself in a positive mode and have high expectations for your piece of work. Y'all besides need to train your middle and trust your power to ready what needs fixing. To practice this, y'all need to teach yourself where to look.

Revising Your Newspaper: Organization , Cohesion , and Unity

When writing a inquiry paper, information technology is easy to become overly focused on editorial details, such every bit the proper format for bibliographical entries. These details do matter. Yet, before yous begin to address them, it is important to spend time reviewing and revising the content of the paper.

A good research newspaper is both organized and cohesive.System means that your statement flows logically from i point to the next.Cohesion means that the elements of your newspaper work together smoothly and naturally. In a cohesive research newspaper, data from enquiry is seamlessly integrated with the writer'due south ideas.

Revise to Improve Arrangement

When you revise to improve organization, you look at the catamenia of ideas throughout the essay every bit a whole and inside individual paragraphs. You check to see that your essay moves logically from the introduction to the body paragraphs to the determination, and that each section reinforces your thesis. Use Checklist 12.one : Revise for Organization to assist you.

Checklist 12.1 : Revise for Organization

At the essay level

Does my introduction proceed conspicuously from the opening to the thesis?

Does each body paragraph accept a clear main idea that relates to the thesis?

Practise the chief ideas in the body paragraphs period in a logical lodge? Is each paragraph connected to the one before it?

Do I demand to add or revise topic sentences or transitions to brand the overall catamenia of ideas clearer?

Does my conclusion summarize my main ideas and revisit my thesis?

At the paragraph level

Does the topic sentence clearly state the main idea?

Practise the details in the paragraph relate to the main idea?

Do I need to recast any sentences or add transitions to ameliorate the flow of sentences?

Jorge reread his typhoon paragraph by paragraph. Every bit he read, he highlighted the main thought of each paragraph so he could see whether his ideas proceeded in a logical order. For the near part, the flow of ideas was articulate. Still, he did notice that 1 paragraph did non have a clear main idea. Information technology interrupted the menstruation of the writing. During revision, Jorge added a topic sentence that conspicuously connected the paragraph to the i that had preceded it. He also added transitions to improve the menses of ideas from sentence to sentence.

Read the post-obit paragraphs twice, the starting time time without Jorge'due south changes, and the second time with them.

Self – practice Practice 12.1

Follow these steps to begin revising your paper's overall organization.

Print out a hard copy of your paper. (Y'all will apply this for multiple self-do exercises in this chapter.)

Read your paper paragraph by paragraph. Highlight your thesis and the topic sentence of each paragraph.

Using the thesis and topic sentences as starting points, outline the ideas you presented—just as you would practise if you were outlining a chapter in a textbook. Do not look at the outline y'all created during prewriting. You may write in the margins of your draft or create a formal outline on a separate sheet of paper.

Next, reread your newspaper more slowly, looking for how ideas menses from sentence to sentence. Place places where adding a transition or recasting a sentence would make the ideas period more logically.

Review the topics on your outline. Is there a logical flow of ideas? Identify any places where you may need to reorganize ideas.

Begin to revise your paper to improve organisation. Start with whatever major issues, such as needing to move an entire paragraph. And so proceed to minor revisions, such as calculation a transitional phrase or tweaking a topic sentence and then it connects ideas more than conspicuously.

Optional collaboration: P charter share your newspaper with a classmate. Repeat the half-dozen steps and take notes on a carve up piece of paper. Share and compare notes.

Tip

Writers choose transitions carefully to show the relationships betwixt ideas—for instance, to make a comparison or elaborate on a point with examples. Make sure your transitions accommodate your purpose and avoid overusing the same ones.

Creating Coherence

Careful writers use transitions to clarify how the ideas in their sentences and paragraphs are related. These words and phrases help the writing menstruation smoothly. Adding transitions is not the but way to meliorate coherence, but they are often useful and give a mature feel to your essays. Earlier chapters have discussed using transitions for specific purposes in the planning of your writing.Table 12.1: Common Transitional Words and Phrases groups many common transitions according to their purpose.

Table 12.ane: Common Transitional Words and Phrases According to Purpose

Transitions That Evidence Sequence or Fourth dimension
after	earlier	later
subsequently	before long	meanwhile
as presently every bit	finally	next
at commencement	first, second, third	soon
at concluding	in the first place	and so
Transitions That Show Position
above	beyond	at the bottom
at the top	behind	below
abreast	beyond	inside
about	next to	opposite
to the left, to the right, to the side	under	where
Transitions That Prove a Conclusion
indeed	hence	in conclusion
in the final assay	therefore	thus
Transitions That Keep a Line of Idea
consequently	furthermore	additionally
because	besides the fact	following this thought farther
in add-on	in the same way	moreover
looking further	considering…, information technology is clear that
Transitions That Change a Line of Idea
but	nevertheless	however
nevertheless	on the reverse	on the other hand
Transitions That Show Importance
higher up all	best	especially
in fact	more than important	>most important
most	worst
Transitions That Introduce the Concluding Thoughts in a Paragraph or Essay
finally	last	in conclusion
most of all	least of all	last of all
All Purpose Transitions to Open up Paragraphs or to Connect Ideas Inside Paragraphs
admittedly	at this bespeak	certainly
granted	it is true	generally speaking
in general	in this situation	no doubt
no ane denies	plain	of course
to be sure	undoubtedly	unquestionably
Transitions that Introduce Examples
for instance	for example	such as
Transitions That Clarify the Order of Events or Steps
first, second, tertiary	generally, furthermore, finally	in the start place, also, final
in the first place, furthermore, finally	in the starting time identify, too, lastly

When Mariah (who you lot were introduced to in Chapters 5 and 6) revised her essay for unity, she examined her paragraph most televisions to check for coherence. She looked for places where she needed to add a transition or maybe reword the text to brand the flow of ideas clear. In the version that follows, she has already deleted the sentences that were off topic.

Tip

Many writers make their revisions on a printed copy and then transfer them to the version on screen. They conventionally apply a minor arrow called a caret (^) to bear witness where to insert an addition or correction.

Self – practice EXERCISE 12.2

Answer the following questions about Mariah's revised paragraph.

Do you agree with the transitions and other changes that Mariah made to her paragraph? Which would you keep and which were unnecessary? Explain.

What transition words or phrases did Mariah add to her paragraph? Why did she choose each one?

What result does calculation additional sentences accept on the coherence of the paragraph? Explicate. When you read both versions aloud, which version has a more logical flow of ideas? Explain.

Revise to Meliorate Cohesion

When yous revise to ameliorate cohesion, you lot analyze how the parts of your paper work together. You wait for anything that seems awkward or out of place. Revision may involve deleting unnecessary material or rewriting parts of the paper and then that the out of place material fits in smoothly.

In a research paper, problems with cohesion usually occur when a writer has trouble integrating source material. If facts or quotations have been awkwardly dropped into a paragraph, they distract or confuse the reader instead of working to support the author's point. Overusing paraphrased and quoted material has the same effect. Utilise Checklist 12.2 : Revise for Cohesion to review your essay for cohesion.

Checklist 12.ii : Revise for Cohesion

Does the opening of the paper clearly connect to the broader topic and thesis? Make certain entertaining quotes or anecdotes serve a purpose.

Accept I included support from enquiry for each main point in the trunk of my newspaper?

Accept I included introductory material before whatsoever quotations? Quotations should never stand up alone in a paragraph.

Does paraphrased and quoted material conspicuously serve to develop my own points?

Practise I need to add to or revise parts of the paper to assist the reader understand how certain information from a source is relevant?

Are there any places where I have overused material from sources?

Does my determination make sense based on the residue of the paper? Make sure whatsoever new questions or suggestions in the determination are clearly linked to earlier material.

As Jorge reread his draft, he looked to see how the dissimilar pieces fit together to show his thesis. He realized that some of his supporting information needed to be integrated more carefully and decided to omit some details entirely. Read the following paragraph, offset without Jorge'south revisions and so with them.

Jorge decided that his comment most pizza and birthday cake came beyond equally subjective and was not necessary to brand his point, so he deleted it. He also realized that the quotation at the end of the paragraph was bad-mannered and ineffective. How would his readers know who Kwon was or why her opinion should be taken seriously? Calculation an introductory phrase helped Jorge integrate this quotation smoothly and establish the credibility of his source.

Self – practice Do 12.3

Follow these steps to begin revising your paper to ameliorate cohesion.

Print out a hard re-create of your paper, or piece of work with your printout fromCocky – Do Exercise 12.1.

Read the body paragraphs of your paper first. Each time you come to a place that cites information from sources, enquire yourself what purpose this information serves. Check that it helps support a indicate and that it is conspicuously related to the other sentences in the paragraph.

Identify unnecessary information from sources that you lot can delete.

Identify places where yous need to revise your writing so that readers sympathize the significance of the details cited from sources.

Skim the body paragraphs over again, looking for any paragraphs that seem packed with citations. Review these paragraphs advisedly for cohesion.

Review your introduction and conclusion. Make sure the information presented works with ideas in the torso of the paper.

Revise the places you identified in your newspaper to improve cohesion.

Optional c ollaboration: P lease exchange papers with a classmate. Consummate stride 4 . On a separate piece of paper, note any areas that would do good from clarification. Return and compare notes.

Writing at Piece of work

Agreement cohesion can also benefit you in the workplace, specially when you have to write and evangelize a presentation. Speakers sometimes rely on cute graphics or funny quotations to hold their audience's attention. If you lot choose to use these elements, make certain they work well with the substantive content of your presentation. For example, if you are asked to give a fiscal presentation, and the financial study shows that the visitor lost money, funny illustrations would not be relevant or advisable for the presentation.

Tip

Reading your writing aloud volition ofttimes help you lot find problems with unity and coherence. Listen for the clarity and period of your ideas. Identify places where you find yourself dislocated, and write a note to yourself about possible fixes.

Creating Unity

Sometimes writers become caught upwards in the moment and cannot resist a adept digression. Even though y'all might enjoy such detours when you lot chat with friends, unplanned digressions usually harm a piece of writing.

Following your outline closely offers you a reasonable guarantee that your writing will stay on purpose and non drift away from the controlling thought. Yet, when writers are rushed, are tired, or cannot find the right words, their writing may go less than they want it to be. Their writing may no longer be articulate and curtailed, and they may add information that is non needed to develop the principal idea.

When a piece of writing hasunity, all the ideas in each paragraph and in the entire essay clearly belong and are arranged in an order that makes logical sense. When the writing hascoherence, the ideas menses smoothly. The wording conspicuously indicates how one idea leads to another within a paragraph and from paragraph to paragraph.

Mariah stayed close to her outline when she drafted the 3 body paragraphs of her essay she tentatively titled "Digital Engineering science: The Newest and the Best at What Price?" But a recent shopping trip for an HDTV upset her enough that she digressed from the principal topic of her third paragraph and included comments nigh the sales staff at the electronics store she visited. When she revised her essay, she deleted the off-topic sentences that affected the unity of the paragraph.

Read the following paragraph twice, the showtime time without Mariah's changes and the 2d time with them.

Self – exercise Do 12.four

Answer the following two questions nearly Mariah'south paragraph:

Do y'all agree with Mariah's decision to make the deletions she made? Did she cut too much, also piffling, or but enough? Explain.

Is the explanation of what screen resolution ways a digression? Or is information technology audience friendly and essential to agreement the paragraph? Explain.

Collaboration: P lease share with a classmate and compare your answers.

Now, print out some other copy of your essay or utilize the printed version(s) you used in Cocky – Exercise Exercises 12.1 and 12.iii . Reread information technology to find any statements that affect the unity of your writing. Decide how all-time to revise.

Tip

When you reread your writing to detect revisions to make, look for each blazon of trouble in a separate sweep. Read it straight through once to locate any bug with unity. Read information technology straight through a second time to discover problems with coherence. Yous may follow this aforementioned do during many stages of the writing process.

Writing at Piece of work

Many companies hire copy editors and proofreaders to assistance them produce the cleanest possible final drafts of big writing projects. Re-create editors are responsible for suggesting revisions and style changes; proofreaders check documents for whatever errors in capitalization, spelling, and punctuation that take crept in. Many times, these tasks are washed on a freelance basis, with one freelancer working for a variety of clients.

Using a Consistent Style and Tone

Once you are certain that the content of your paper fulfills your purpose, you tin begin revising to improvestyle andtone. Together, your style and tone create the voice of your paper, or how you come across to readers. Style refers to the fashion you use language every bit a author—the sentence structures you lot use and the word choices yous make. Tone is the attitude toward your subject and audience that you convey through your discussion option.

Determining an Advisable Way and Tone

Although accepted writing styles will vary within different disciplines, the underlying goal is the aforementioned—to come up across to your readers as a knowledgeable, authoritative guide. Writing almost research is like beingness a tour guide who walks readers through a topic. A stuffy, overly formal tour guide tin can make readers experience put off or intimidated. Too much informality or sense of humor tin make readers wonder whether the tour guide really knows what he or she is talking about. Extreme or emotionally charged linguistic communication comes across as unbalanced.

To help prevent being overly formal or informal, make up one's mind an appropriate fashion and tone at the beginning of the research process. Consider your topic and audience because these can assist dictate manner and tone. For example, a newspaper on new breakthroughs in cancer research should be more than formal than a newspaper on means to get a good dark's slumber.

A potent research paper comes beyond as straightforward, accordingly bookish, and serious. Information technology is more often than not best to avoid writing in the beginning person, as this can make your paper seem overly subjective and stance based. Utilise Checklist 12.iii : Revise for Style to review your paper for other issues that affect style and tone. You lot tin can cheque for consistency at the cease of the writing process. Checking for consistency is discussed subsequently in this section.

Checklist 12.3 : Revise for Style

My paper avoids excessive wordiness.

My sentences are varied in length and structure.

I have avoided using commencement person pronouns such as I and nosotros.

I have used the agile voice whenever possible.

I have defined specialized terms that might be unfamiliar to readers.

I have used clear, straightforward linguistic communication whenever possible and avoided unnecessary jargon.

My paper states my indicate of view using a balanced tone—neither as well indecisive nor also forceful.

Word Choice

Note that word choice is an especially important aspect of style. In addition to checking the points noted on Checklist 12.3, review your paper to brand sure your language is precise, conveys no unintended connotations, and is costless of bias. Here are some of the points to check for:

Vague or imprecise terms

Slang

Repetition of the same phrases ("Smith states…, Jones states…") to introduce quoted and paraphrased material (For a total list of strong verbs to use with in text citations, seeChapter nine: Citations and Referencing.)

Exclusive use of masculine pronouns or awkward apply ofhe or she

Utilize of language with negative connotations, such as haughty or ridiculous

Utilize of outdated or offensive terms to refer to specific ethnic, racial, or religious groups

Tip

Using plural nouns and pronouns or recasting a judgement tin help y'all go along your language gender neutral while fugitive clumsiness. Consider the following examples.

• Gender biased : When a writer cites a source in the body of his paper, he must list it on his references page.
• Awkward : When a author cites a source in the body of his or her paper, he or she must list it on his or her references page.
• Improved : Writers must list any sources cited in the trunk of a paper on the references page.

Keeping Your Style Consistent

As you revise your paper, make sure your fashion is consistent throughout. Await for instances where a word, phrase, or sentence does not seem to fit with the rest of the writing. It is best to reread for style after you have completed the other revisions so that you are non distracted past whatever larger content issues. Revising strategies you tin can use include the following:

Read your paper aloud. Sometimes your ears catch inconsistencies that your eyes miss.

Share your paper with another reader whom you trust to requite y'all honest feedback. Information technology is often difficult to evaluate ane'southward own manner objectively—especially in the final phase of a challenging writing projection. Another reader may be more than likely to observe instances of wordiness, disruptive language, or other bug that impact fashion and tone.

E dit your newspaper slowly, sentence by sentence. You may even wish to employ a sheet of paper to cover up everything on the page except the paragraph you are editing. This practice forces you to read slowly and advisedly. Mark whatever areas where you lot detect problems in fashion or tone, so accept fourth dimension to rework those sections.

On reviewing his paper, Jorge found that he had generally used an appropriately bookish mode and tone. Even so, he noticed one glaring exception—his first paragraph. He realized there were places where his overly breezy writing could come beyond equally unserious or, worse, disparaging. Revising his give-and-take choice and omitting a humorous bated helped Jorge maintain a consistent tone. Read his revisions.

Cocky – practice Exercise 12.5

Using Checklist 12.iii : Revise for Style , revise your paper line by line. Y'all may use either of these techniques:

Print out a hard copy of your paper or work with your printout fromSelf – Practise Exercise 12.1. Read it line by line. Check for the issues noted on Checklist 12.3, as well as whatsoever other aspects of your writing mode you take previously identified as areas for improvement. Marking any areas where yous notice bug in way or tone, and so take time to rework those sections.

If you prefer to work with an electronic document, apply the menu options in your give-and-take processing program to enlarge the text to 150 or 200 pct of the original size. Brand certain the type is large enough that you tin can focus on one paragraph at a time. Read the paper line past line as described in pace one. Highlight any areas where y'all observe problems in style or tone, and then have fourth dimension to rework those sections.

Optional c ollaboration: P lease exchange papers with a classmate. On a split piece of paper, note places where the essay does not seem to period or y'all have questions about what was written. Return the essay and compare notes.

Completing a Peer Review

After working then closely with a piece of writing, writers often need to stride dorsum and inquire for a more objective reader. What writers need most is feedback from readers who tin can respond only to the words on the page. When they are ready, writers testify their drafts to someone they respect and who can requite an honest response about its strengths and weaknesses.

You, as well, tin can inquire a peer to read your typhoon when it is gear up. After evaluating the feedback and assessing what is most helpful, the reader'southward feedback volition aid you when you revise your draft. This procedure is calledpeer review.

You tin work with a partner in your class and identify specific ways to strengthen each other's essays. Although you may be uncomfortable sharing your writing at get-go, call up that each writer is working toward the same goal: a final draft that fits the audience and the purpose. Maintaining a positive attitude when providing feedback will put you and your partner at ease. The box that follows provides a useful framework for the peer review session.

Questions for Peer Review: Organization, Unity, and Coherence

Title of essay: ____________________________________________

Date: ____________________________________________

Writer'south name: ____________________________________________

Peer reviewer's name: _________________________________________

This essay is about____________________________________________.

Your master points in this essay are____________________________________________.

What I most liked almost this essay is____________________________________________.

These three points struck me every bit your strongest:

Point: ____________________________________________
Why: ____________________________________________

Point: ____________________________________________
Why: ____________________________________________

Point: ____________________________________________
Why: ____________________________________________

These places in your essay are non articulate to me:

Where: ____________________________________________
Needs improvement because__________________________________________

Where: ____________________________________________
Needs improvement because ____________________________________________

Where: ____________________________________________

Needs improvement because ____________________________________________

The one boosted change yous could make that would meliorate this essay significantly is ____________________________________________.

Writing at Work

One of the reasons why discussion processing programs build in a reviewing characteristic is that work groups have become a common feature in many businesses. Writing is often collaborative, and the members of a work group and their supervisors often critique group members' work and offering feedback that will lead to a better concluding product.

Self – exercise Practice 12.6

Commutation essays with a classmate and complete a peer review of each other'due south draft in progress. Remember to requite positive feedback and to be courteous and polite in your responses. Focus on providing one positive comment and 1 question for more than information to the author.

Using Feedback Objectively

The purpose of peer feedback is to receive effective criticism of your essay. Your peer reviewer is your kickoff existent audience, and you lot have the opportunity to learn what confuses and delights a reader then that y'all can improve your work before sharing the final typhoon with a wider audience (or your intended audience).

It may not be necessary to incorporate every recommendation your peer reviewer makes. However, if y'all start to observe a pattern in the responses y'all receive from peer reviewers, you might want to consider that feedback in time to come assignments. For case, if yous read consistent comments about a need for more than research, and then yous may want to consider including more research in time to come assignments.

Using Feedback from Multiple Sources

You might become feedback from more than i reader equally you share different stages of your revised draft. In this situation, you lot may receive feedback from readers who exercise not empathise the assignment or who lack your interest with and enthusiasm for it.

You need to evaluate the responses you receive according to two important criteria:

Determine if the feedback supports the purpose of the consignment.

Make up one's mind if the suggested revisions are advisable to the audience.

Then, using these standards, accept or reject revision feedback.

Self – practise EXERCISE 12.7

Consider the feedback you received from the peer review and all of the revision exercises throughout this section. Compile a terminal draft of your revisions that yous can use in the side by side section to complete your final edits.

Key Takeaways

• Revising and editing are the stages of the writing process in which you amend your piece of work before producing a final draft.
• Unity in writing ways that all the ideas in each paragraph and in the entire essay clearly belong together and are arranged in an club that makes logical sense.
• Coherence in writing means that the author's diction clearly indicates how one idea leads to another within a paragraph and between paragraphs.
• Transitional words and phrases effectively make writing more than coherent.
• Writing should exist clear and concise, with no unnecessary words.
• Effective formal writing uses specific, appropriate words and avoids slang, contractions, clichés, and overly general words.
• Peer reviews, done properly, can give writers objective feedback well-nigh their writing. It is the author'south responsibleness to evaluate the results of peer reviews and incorporate only useful feedback.

12.2 Editing and Developing a Final Draft of a Research Paper

Learning Objectives

• Edit your paper to ensure that language, citations, and formatting are correct

Given all the fourth dimension and effort y'all have put into your enquiry paper, yous volition want to make certain that your final draft represents your all-time piece of work. This requires taking the time to revise and edit your paper carefully.

You may experience like you need a break from your paper earlier you edit it. That feeling is understandable, and then you want to be sure to leave yourself enough time to consummate this important stage of the writing procedure. This section presents a number of opportunities for you lot to focus on different aspects of the editing procedure; every bit with revising a draft, you should approach editing in dissimilar stages.

Some of the content in this section may seem repetitive, simply again, it provides you with a adventure to double-check whatsoever revisions y'all have made at a detailed level.

Editing Your Draft

If you have been incorporating each set of revisions as Mariah and Jorge have, y'all have produced multiple drafts of your writing. So far, all your changes have been content changes. Perhaps with the aid of peer feedback, you have made sure that you sufficiently supported your ideas. You accept checked for issues with unity and coherence. You accept examined your essay for word selection, revising to cut unnecessary words and to supplant weak wording with specific and advisable wording.

The adjacent pace later on revising the content is editing. When y'all edit, you lot examine the surface features of your text. Y'all examine your spelling, grammar, usage, and punctuation. You also make sure you lot use the proper format when creating your finished assignment.

Tip

Editing takes time. Be sure to budget time into the writing process to consummate additional edits later revising. Editing and proofreading your writing helps you create a finished work that represents your best efforts. Hither are a few more tips to call back near your readers:

Readers practise non notice correct spelling, but theydo notice misspellings.

Readers look by your sentences to get to your ideas—unless the sentences are bad-mannered, poorly constructed, and frustrating to read.

Readers notice when every sentence has the same rhythm as every other sentence, with no diversity.

Readers exercise not cheer when you usein that location,their, andthey're correctly, but they notice when y'all do not.

Readers volition notice the care with which y'all handled your assignment and your attention to detail in the delivery of an error-gratuitous document.

Existence Articulate and Concise

Some writers are very methodical and painstaking when they write a first typhoon. Other writers unleash a lot of words in order to get out all that they feel they demand to say. Do either of these methods match your style? Or is your composing way somewhere in between? No affair which clarification best fits you lot, the first typhoon of almost every piece of writing, no matter its author, tin can exist made clearer and more curtailed.

If you have a trend to write besides much, you will need to look for unnecessary words. If yous have a tendency to exist vague or imprecise in your wording, yous will need to discover specific words to replace any overly general language.

Identifying Wordiness

Sometimes writers use too many words when fewer words will appeal more to their audience and amend fit their purpose. Hither are some mutual examples of wordiness to look for in your typhoon. Eliminating wordiness helps all readers, because it makes your ideas clear, direct, and straightforward.

• Sentences that brainstorm withThere isorThere are
• Wordy . There are 2 major experiments that the Biological science Department sponsors.
• Revised . The Biology Department sponsors 2 major experiments.
• Sentences with unnecessary modifiers
• Wordy . Two extremely famous and well-known consumer advocates spoke eloquently in favour of the proposed important legislation.
• Revised . Two well-known consumer advocates spoke in favour of the proposed legislation.

Sentences with deadwood phrases that add little to the meaning. Be judicious when y'all use phrases such asin terms of,with a listen to,on the discipline of,as to whether or not,more or less,as far as…is concerned, and similar expressions. You lot can commonly discover a more straightforward mode to state your point.

• Wordy . Every bit a world leader in the field of green engineering science, the company plans to focus its efforts in the area of geothermal energy. A report as to whether or not to apply geysers as an energy source is in the process of preparation.
• Revised . As a world leader in green engineering, the visitor plans to focus on geothermal free energy. Researchers are preparing a report about using geysers every bit an energy source.

Sentences in the passive voice or with forms of the verbto be : Sentences with passive phonation verbs often create confusion considering the subject of the judgement does not perform an action. Sentences are clearer when the subject performs the activeness and is followed by a strong verb. Use strong active voice verbs in place of forms ofto be, which tin pb to wordiness. Avert passive voice when you can.

• Wordy . It might perhaps be said that using a GPS device is something that is a do good to drivers who accept a poor sense of direction.
• Revised . Using a GPS device benefits drivers who take a poor sense of direction.

Sentences with constructions that can exist shortened

• Wordy . The e-volume reader, which is a recent invention, may become equally commonplace as the prison cell telephone. My over-60 uncle bought an e-book reader, and his married woman bought an eastward-volume reader, too.
• Revised . The due east-book reader, a recent invention, may go equally commonplace every bit the cell telephone. My over-60 uncle and his wife both bought e-book readers.

Choosing Specific, Appropriate Words

About essays at the post-secondary level should be written in formal English language suitable for an bookish state of affairs. Follow these principles to be sure that your word pick is advisable. For more information about word choice, run intoChapter 2: Working with Words: Which Give-and-take Is Right?

Avert slang . Find alternatives tobummer,kewl, andrad.

Avoid linguistic communication that is overly casual . Write virtually "men and women" rather than "girls and guys" unless you lot are trying to create a specific effect. A formal tone calls for formal linguistic communication.

Avert contractions . Usedo not in place ofdon't,I am in place ofI'thousand,take not in place ofhaven't, and so on. Contractions are considered casual speech.

Avoid clichés . Overused expressions such equallygreen with envy,face the music,better late than never, and similar expressions are empty of meaning and may non appeal to your audition.

Be careful when you use words that sound alike but have different meanings . Some examples areallusion/illusion; complement/compliment; quango/counsel; concurrent/consecutive; founder/flounder; and historic/historical. When in doubt, check a lexicon.

Choose words with the connotations yous want . Choosing a word for its connotations is as important in formal essay writing equally it is in all kinds of writing. Compare the positive connotations of the discussionproud and the negative connotations ofbig-headed andconceited.

Use specific words rather than overly general words . Find synonyms forthing,people,dainty,skilful,bad,interesting, and other vague words. Or utilize specific details to make your exact meaning clear.

Now read the revisions Mariah made to make her third paragraph clearer and more concise. She has already incorporated the changes she made to improve unity and coherence.

Cocky – practice EXERCISE 12.8

Answer the following questions about Mariah'due south revised paragraph:

Read the unrevised and the revised paragraphs aloud. Explain in your ain words how changes in word choice take afflicted Mariah's writing.

Do you agree with the changes that Mariah made to her paragraph? Which changes would you go on and which were unnecessary? Explicate. What other changes would you have made?

What effect does removing contractions and the pronoun ^y'all accept on the tone of the paragraph? How would you characterize the tone now? Why?

Now render again to your essay in progress. Read carefully for problems with word choice. Be sure that your draft is written in formal linguistic communication and that your word choice is specific and appropriate.

Cocky – practice EXERCISE 12.nine

R eturn once again to the commencement draft of the essay you have been revising. Check it for unnecessary words.

Try making your sentences as concise equally they tin be.

Brief Punctuation Review

Throughout this book, you accept been presented with a number of tables containing transitional words. Table 12.2: Punctuating Transitional Words and Phrases shows many of the transition words you have seen organized into different categories to help you know how to punctuate with each one.

Table 12.2: Punctuating Transitional Words and Phrases

Joining Contained Clauses (coordination)
2 IND	Analogous conjunctions: FANBOYS		Conjunctive adverbs and other transitional expressions
IND ; IND	IND , ____ IND		IND . _____, IND or IND ; _____, IND
	for		accordingly		after all
	and		after a while		also
	nor		anyhow		as a upshot
	but		at any charge per unit		at the same time
	or		as well		consequently
	however		for example		for example
	so		furthermore		hence
			henceforth		however
			in addition		indeed
			in fact		in other words
			in particular		instead
			in the starting time place		besides
			meanwhile		moreover
			nevertheless		nonetheless
			on the contrary		on the other hand
			otherwise		all the same
			then		therefore
			thus
Forming Dependent Clauses (subordination)
IND + DEP or DEP , IND
later	although	as		as if		as though
considering	before	if		in order that		since
then that	that	though		unless		until
when	whenever	where		wherever
*which	while	who		whom		whose

* This row contains relative pronouns, which may exist punctuated differently.

Joining Independent Clauses

In that location are 3 ways to join independent clauses. By using a mix of all three methods and varying your transition words, you volition add complexity to your writing and improve the flow. You will too be emphasizing to your reader which ideas you want to connect or to show things like cause and effect or dissimilarity. For a more detailed review of contained clauses, wait dorsum at Affiliate 3: Putting Ideas into Your Own Words and Paragraphs. Choice ane By simply using a semicolon (;), you tin brand the ideas connect more than if you were to use a menstruum. If you are trying to reinforce that connection, use a semicolon because information technology is not as strong of a pause every bit a menstruum and reinforces the link. Option 2 When you want to link two independent sentences and increment the menses between ideas, y'all can add a comma and a coordinating conjunction between them. With coordinating conjunctions (FANBOYS: for, and, nor, only, or, however, then), you practice not use a comma every time: you would only practice so if what is on either side of the conjunction is a complete sentence not but a phrase. You would non put a comma if you are only giving a list of two items. For example:

Comma:It is cold outside, so I wore an extra warm coat.

No comma: It is common cold outside. I wore an extra warm glaze and gloves.

The first case contains a complete sentence (independent clause) on either side of the conjunction and so. Just the conjunction past itself or just a comma by itself is not strong enough to join two independent clauses. Still, if you put the ii together with then, you can link the two. In the second case, and is simply connecting ii noun phrases: warm coat and gloves. What comes after the conjunction is not a complete sentence, so y'all would not add a comma. To check if at that place is a complete, independent clause, ask yourself, "Can that part stand up past itself as a complete sentence?" In the case of the no comma example, gloves is what comes after the comma. That is not a consummate judgement, but a noun: that means information technology is office of a list and is non a complete judgement = no comma. The indicate of these examples was to show you that you have to exist careful how yous use commas and conjunctions. As easy as it would exist to but always toss in a comma, doing and so would confuse your reader every bit what is and is not office of a list and what ideas are joined. Selection 3 Your tertiary option is to join two independent clauses with a conjunctive adverb or another transition word. These words are very useful considering they clearly prove your reader how you would like your ideas to connect. If you lot wanted to emphasize contrasting ideas, you would use on the other mitt or however. If y'all wanted to show cause and effect, yous could use as a upshot. Refer to the tables you have seen in other chapters to make sure you lot are using the transitions yous actually hateful to exist using; then, cheque Table 12.two to ostend how you should punctuate information technology. Later on your showtime contained clause, you lot can choose to either use a menstruation or a semicolon, again depending on how much of a link yous want to show. Y'all may also want to consider how many long sentences yous take used prior to this. If you utilise a lot of complicated sentences, you should probably use a menstruum to permit your reader to have a break. You must also call back to include a comma after the transition discussion.

Flow:It is common cold outside. Therefore, I wore an extra warm coat.

Semicolon: It is cold exterior; therefore, I wore an extra warm glaze.

Joining Dependent Clauses

If one of the clauses in a judgement is independent and can stand on its ain, but the other is not, you accept to construct the sentence a little differently. Whenever you add together a subordinating conjunction or relative pronoun to an contained sentence, you create a dependent clause—i that can never stand alone. In the examples beneath, detect that when the contained clause comes starting time, it is strong enough to carry the dependent clause at the end without any helping punctuation. However, if yous want the dependent clause first, you must add a comma between it and the contained clause: the dependent clause is not potent enough to back up the independent clause after without a little aid. In the examples below, the independent clauses are double underlined and the dependent clause has a single underline.

IND commencement:I wore an extra warm coat as it is common cold outside.

DEP first: As information technology is cold exterior, I wore an extra warm glaze.

Tip

If you lot want to start a judgement with Because, you demand to brand sure there is a second half to that sentence that is independent. A Considering (dependent) clause tin never stand by itself.

At the bottom on Table 12.2, you lot can run across a listing of v dependent markers that can be used a little differently. These are relative pronouns, and when you apply them, yous need to inquire yourself if the information is 100 percentage necessary for the reader to understand what yous are describing. If it is optional, yous can include a comma before the relative clause even if it comes later the independent clause.

Not – essential:As it is cold exterior, I wore an extra warm glaze, which was bluish.

Essential: My glaze which is blueish is the 1 I article of clothing when it is really cold exterior.

In the non – essential example, the fact that the coat was warm was probably more than important than that the coat was blue. The information that the coat is blue probably would non make a deviation in keeping the person warm, so the information in that relative clause is not terribly important. Calculation the comma earlier the clause tells the reader it is extra information. In the essential instance, the apply of the same clause without a preceding comma shows that this data is important. The writer is implying he has other coats that are not every bit warm and are not blueish, so he is emphasizing the importance of the blue coat. These are the only 5 subordinators, or relative pronouns, for which y'all can do this; every other ane needs to follow the previous explanation of how to use these dependent transition words. If you practise determine to add a comma with one of the relative pronouns, you need to think critically about whether or non that description is completely essential.

Using any of these sentence joining strategies is helpful in providing sentence variety to help your reader stay engaged and reading attentively. Past post-obit these punctuation rules, y'all will also avoid creating sentence fragments, run-on sentences, and comma splices, all of which improves your finish product.

Given how much work you accept put into your research paper, you will desire to check for any errors that could distract or confuse your readers. Using the spell checking characteristic in your word processing program can be helpful, information technology should not supersede a full, careful review of your document. Exist sure to check for whatsoever errors that may have come up up frequently for y'all in the past. Employ Checklist 12.four: Editing Your Writing to help you as yous edit.

Checklist 12.4 : Editing Your Writing

Grammar

Are some sentences actually sentence fragments?

Are some sentences run-on? How tin I correct them?

Practice some sentences need conjunctions between contained clauses?

Does every verb agree with its discipline?

Is every verb in the correct tense?

Are tense forms, especially for irregular verbs, written correctly?

Take I used subject, object, and possessive personal pronouns correctly?

Take I usedwho andwhom correctly?

Is the ancestor of every pronoun clear?

Do all personal pronouns agree with their antecedents?

Have I used the correct comparative and summit forms of adjectives and adverbs?

Is information technology clear which give-and-take a participial phrase modifies, or is it a dangling modifier?

Sentence Structure

Are all my sentences uncomplicated sentences, or do I vary my judgement structure?

Have I chosen the best coordinating or subordinating conjunctions to join clauses?

Have I created long, overpacked sentences that should be shortened for clarity?

Practise I encounter any mistakes in parallel structure?

Punctuation

Does every sentence end with the right finish punctuation?

Tin can I justify the use of every assertion point?

Have I used apostrophes correctly to write all atypical and plural possessive forms?

Take I used quotation marks correctly?

Mechanics and Usage

Can I discover whatever spelling errors? How can I correct them?

Take I used capital messages where they are needed?

Have I written abbreviations, where allowed, correctly?

Can I find any errors in the utilize of commonly dislocated words, such as to/likewise/two?

Tip

Be careful virtually relying besides much on spelling checkers and grammar checkers. A spelling checker cannot recognize that you meant to write principle simply wroteprincipal instead. A grammar checker often queries constructions that are perfectly correct. The program does not understand your meaning; it makes its check against a general set of formulas that might not use in each instance. If you use a grammar checker, accept the suggestions that brand sense, but consider why the suggestions came upwardly.

Tip

Proofreading requires patience; it is very piece of cake to read by a mistake. Set your paper aside for at least a few hours, if non a day or more, so your mind will remainder. Some professional proofreaders read a text backward so they can concentrate on spelling and punctuation. Another helpful technique is to slowly read a paper aloud, paying attending to every give-and-take, letter, and punctuation mark.

If you need additional proofreading help, ask a reliable friend, classmate, or peer tutor to make a concluding pass on your paper to look for anything you missed.

Formatting

Your finished assignment should exist properly formatted, post-obit the mode required of you. Formatting includes the mode of the title, margin size, folio number placement, location of the writer's proper name, and other factors. Your instructor or department may require a specific style to be used. The requirements may exist more detailed and rigid for research projects and term papers, which often observe the American Psychological Clan (APA) way guide, particularly when citations of sources are included.

To ensure the format is correct and follows any specific instructions, make a final cheque before you submit an consignment.

Cocky- exercise EXERCISE 12.10

With the help of Checklist 12.four, edit and proofread your essay.

Checking Citations and Formatting

When editing a research paper, it is also important to cheque that you have cited sources properly and formatted your document according to the specified guidelines. There are ii reasons for this. First, citing sources correctly ensures that you give proper credit to other people for ideas and information that helped you in your work. 2d, using correct formatting establishes your paper as 1 pupil's contribution to the work developed past and for a larger bookish customs. Increasingly, American Psychological Association (APA) style guidelines are the standard for many academic fields. Utilize Checklist 12.five: Citations and Formatting to help.

Checklist 12.5 : Citations and Formatting

Within the torso of my paper, each fact or thought taken from a source is credited to the right source.

Each in-text citation includes the source author's name (or, where applicable, the arrangement name or source title) and year of publication. I have used the correct format of in text and parenthetical citations.

Each source cited in the body of my paper has a corresponding entry in the references section of my paper.

My references section includes a heading and double-spaced alphabetized entries.

Each entry in my references section is indented on the 2nd line and all subsequent lines.

Each entry in my references section includes all the necessary information for that source type, in the correct sequence and format.

My paper includes a title page.

My paper includes a running head.

The margins of my newspaper are set at ane inch. Text is double spaced and set in a standard 12-bespeak font.

For detailed guidelines on APA citation and formatting, meetAffiliate 9: Citations and Referencing.

Writing at Work

Following APA citation and formatting guidelines may require time and try. Yet, information technology is proficient practice for learning how to follow accepted conventions in any professional field. Many large corporations create a fashion manual with guidelines for editing and formatting documents produced by that corporation. Employees follow the style manual when creating internal documents and documents for publication.

During the process of revising and editing, Jorge fabricated changes in the content and way of his paper. He as well gave the paper a final review to check for overall correctness and, particularly, right APA citations and formatting. Read the final typhoon of his paper.

With the assistance of Checklist 12.5, edit and proofread your essay.

Although you probably do non want to look at your paper over again before you submit it to your instructor, take the time to do a concluding check. Since you lot have already worked through all of the checklists to a higher place focusing on sure aspects at once, working through ane last checklist should confirm you accept written a potent, persuasive essay and that everything is the way you desire it to be. As extra insurance you have produced a strong paper, you may even want someone else to double-check your essay using C hecklist 12.6: Terminal Revision. And then you can compare to see how your perceptions of your paper match those of someone else, essentially having that person human activity as the one who will be grading your paper.

Checklist 12.6: Final Revision

Commencement Revision 1 : Organization
___	Do you bear witness y'all sympathize the consignment: purpose, audience, and genre?
___	Focus: Have you clearly stated your thesis (your controlling idea) in the starting time paragraph?
___	Does your thesis argument take hold of the reader'southward attention?
___	Unity: Write your opening and endmost paragraphs and place each topic sentence in between. You should accept a "mini essay" with several dissimilar chief points supporting your thesis.
___	Are your paragraphs organized in a logical mode?
___ ___	Does each topic judgement (per paragraph) logically follow the ane preceding it?
	Do y'all have several points to support your thesis?
___ ___ ___	Cheque whether your paragraphs are organized co-ordinate to a specific blueprint.
	Would rearranging your paragraphs support your thesis better?
	Accept you provided a comprehensive decision to your essay? Does it summarize your main points (using unlike words)?
First Revision 2 : Paragraphs and Sentences
___ ___ ___ ___ ___   ___ ___ ___   ___   ___	Does each paragraph take main points and supporting details?
	Does each paragraph have only one chief point?
	Is your approach or design used to develop your paragraph'southward main betoken followed?
	Bank check that each sentence is relevant to the primary point of the paragraph.
	Are in that location several sentences giving details, facts, quotes, reasons, and arguments in each paragraph?
	Is each supporting detail specific, concrete, and relevant to the topic sentence?
	Does each sentence logically follow the preceding 1?
	Have you lot used transitional words to aid the reader follow your thoughts? If not, add them.
	Paragraph length: If too short, develop farther. If too long, pause into smaller paragraphs or consolidate some sentences.
	Check your essay for tone and indicate of view.
Second Revision one : Sentences and Usage
___ ___ ___ ___	Ostend that each sentence has a field of study and a verb.
	Revise fragments, splices, and run-on sentences.
	Check modifiers to see if they have been put in unclear places.
	Do you lot have a variety of sentence structures? (simple and complex)
___ ___   ___ ___ ___	Scan for subject-verb agreement in each sentence.
	Are you consistent with your verb tenses? Cheque to make sure there are not whatever confusing or irrelevant tense changes.
	Make sure that words in lists are in parallel forms.
	Think through your pronouns; what is each 1 referring to?
	Check for disruptive "person" shifts within paragraphs. Proceed the subjects consistent.
___ ___ ___ ___   ___	Identify all verbs and alter any that are passive to active.
	Use potent verbs non weak adverbs. Say something "is" not that it "may be."
	Check for wordiness.
	Scan to make sure you have non used the aforementioned give-and-take repeatedly in the same judgement and paragraph. Use a thesaurus.
	Look for and eliminate clichés.
Second Revision 2 : Documentation
___ ___ ___ ___	Have yous documented all your references?
	Have yous used in text citations every time they were needed? Accept y'all formatted all your citations correctly?
	Is your references' section complete and right co-ordinate to the JIBC APA Style Guide.
Second Revision 3 : Mechanics
___ ___	Check that all words and sentences are punctuated according to standard usage.
	Check for spelling and typographical errors.
Tertiary Revision: Content
___ ___ ___ ___	Read your essay aloud. Do you lot believe what you have written?
	At this point exercise you develop your controlling idea in a manner that makes sense?
	Take you provided enough background information? Is information technology relevant/necessary?
	Accept you primarily used paraphrasing as opposed to direct quotations?

Yous should at present be confident y'all have produced a strong statement that is wonderfully constructed and that you will be able to persuade your audition that your points and point of view are valid.

Key Takeaways

• During revising, you add, cutting, motility, or change information in guild to meliorate content.
• During editing, you lot have a second look at the words and sentences you used to express your ideas and fix whatsoever problems in grammer, punctuation, and sentence structure.
• Remember to budget time for conscientious editing and proofreading. Use all available resources, including editing checklists, peer editing, and your establishment'south writing lab, to improve your editing skills.
• Organization in a research paper means that the statement gain logically from the introduction to the trunk to the conclusion. It flows logically from 1 signal to the adjacent. When revising a research newspaper, evaluate the system of the newspaper every bit a whole and the organization of individual paragraphs.
• In a cohesive research newspaper, the elements of the newspaper work together smoothly and naturally. When revising a research paper, evaluate its cohesion. In particular, cheque that information from research is smoothly integrated with your ideas.
• An constructive research paper uses a style and tone that are appropriately academic and serious. When revising a research newspaper, check that the fashion and tone are consistent throughout.
• Editing a research paper involves checking for errors in grammer, mechanics, punctuation, usage, spelling, citations, and formatting.

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Source: https://opentextbc.ca/writingforsuccess/chapter/chapter-12-peer-review-and-final-revisions/

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